October Literary Horoscopes
Words By Alyssa Jordan, Art By Joana Coccarelli
The Ram / Courageous, Adventurous, Independent / Domineering, Selfish, Arrogant
In October, hurdles will dissolve like candy melts. You’ll even get a second wind around the 19th, so keep bobbing for those apples—er, goals. Not caramel apples or that chocolate you want to eat while you procrastinate (nope, not at all).
Anyway! Save this delightful piece for a Halloween treat.
- Pop Goes Your Dreams, by Stephen Pisani
- Teaser: “I pop people’s dreams. Literally. It’s good business, recession-proof even, because everyone has dreams.”
The Bull / Loyal, Friendly, Resourceful / Self-Indulgent, Possessive, Greedy
A few bad habits will rise like the dead this month (see what I did there). You might be tempted to bar the door, but one or two could warrant a closer look. When you’re not delving into your own psyche, bust out some stale candy and enjoy campy movies. It’s that time of year, after all.
You also have this stunning story at your fingertips.
- Acorns of Memories, by Shome Dasgupta
- Teaser: “Eyes closed tight—the humid air pressed heavy on the back of his neck, he closed his eyes tighter, hurting his own skull—a jawbone of no release.”
The Twins / Intelligent, Adaptable, Creative / Moody, Opportunistic, Inconsistent
Good news, Gemini! Pumpkin-spice season will treat you like an old friend. Minds like yours tend to thrive in that space between spring and summer, but you’ll still have a good time this month. Be your adaptable self and throw on that witchy hat (I know you want to, deep down).
But first, check out your monthly read.
- All We Know of Death is its Music, by William Bortz
- Teaser: “the hovering moon splinters above / bodies not welcomed back to the living / trying to speak your name is / like throwing a fist in a dream—all air / no impact.”
The Crab / Honest, Generous, Faithful / Insecure, Needy, Crabby
Don’t give into the social distancing blues. You can still be a zombie, but put on some cute clothes first. Buy your favorite treats, light a seasonal candle; pull out all the stops. It might just make you feel better. If all else fails, open your window and take in that crisp air (unless you’re near the fires, in which case, I’m giving you a hug, friend).
Keep distracting yourself with this moving piece.
- From underneath, by Evan James Sheldon
- Teaser: “After a while, I took him outside. There was no moon that night and as the stars blinked through drifting clouds, so did my son, eyes wide for the first time, taking in the whole dark world.”
The Lion / Cheery, Noble, Imaginative / Demanding, Boastful, Melodramatic
This month, do your best “Kim K” impression and ignore the haters. They’re just jealous of your fabulous self. And don’t forget to reward yourself—you killed it at work last month, and now you get to reap the rewards (I’d apologize for all the word play, but Halloween is the best time of the year; sorry not sorry!)
Speaking of rewards, I handpicked this coffin just for you. Wink, wink.
- Side by Side, by Arlen Feldman
- Teaser: “His coffin was quite pleasant, with silk lining and a comfortable pillow. More comfortable than that damned bed. He felt the tension pour out of him. He was more relaxed now than he could ever remember being while alive. Let her try and get this blanket.”
The Maiden / Practical, Diligent, Kind / Obsessive, Self-Righteous, Compulsive
October will be a ghoulishly good time for you. What can I say; you must have racked up some serious karma points! Enjoy the ride while it lasts. Around the 25th, you’ll even get an extra boost from Lady Luck. Buy a lotto ticket or a Wonka bar—you’re bound to get something with a little gold.
And read your monthly pick, of course.
- Three Poems, by Andy Lopez
- Teaser: “This is more or less how it goes: / you wake up & the dragon is loose again. / the fields were black long before they could / bear you fruit. You wake up / with smoke like treacle in your throat.”
The Scales / Compassionate, Trustworthy, Peacemaker / Disorganized, Materialistic, Indecisive
If September was a box of dollar-store chocolate, then October is See’s Candy all the way! That’s right, Libra: This month is all about you. The Day of the Dead will be your best day yet. For the time being, think of yourself as a four-leaf clover. A rabbit’s foot. A shiny penny. A unicorn to best all other unicorns—you get the idea.
First thing’s first: Dive into this magical and engrossing read.
- Small Magics, by Juliet Kemp
- Teaser: “Her brother arrives every few decades in a flurry of storm, snow on his shoulders and in his beard whatever the season outside. His magics are not subtle, and he reaches constantly for something larger.”
The Scorpion / Purposeful, Charismatic, Cunning / Aggressive, Manipulative, Possessive
Toward the beginning of the month, you’ll need to break territory lines and welcome a few guests. C’mon, I know you’re possessive, but good behavior will earn you some rewards. I’m talking down n’ dirty flirting around All Hallows’ Eve.
And don’t forget to howl at the moon. Tis the season, after all!
- Corpse Walks into a Bar, by Lesley Bannatyne
- Teaser: “There was nothing really special about Patty except there was. This is the story of Patty: she was here, and we were better because of that. Because we loved her. And now she’s gone, but we’re still better.”
The Archer / Straightforward, Optimistic, Adventurous / Careless, Impatient, Hotheaded
When it came to stress, you drew the short straw in September. This month, your spirits will lift—winter is coming, eventually, I swear—and only a few tiny obstacles will remain. For the most part, you’ll be in a pumpkin-carving, Death Becomes Her kind of mood (that’s a good thing!)
Speaking of good things, I saved this poignant piece for you.
- Through a Hole in the Floor, by David Klose
- Teaser: “He peered in with the small flashlight he kept on his key chain and saw nothing. He inhaled but smelled nothing. He wondered of the hole’s depth.”
The Mountain Sea-Goat / Traditional, Responsible, Ambitious / Unforgiving, Blunt, Pessimistic
If last month was all about indulgence, then October is your time to shine in the family department. Schedule two or six video chats and rock that bonding time. If you need an icebreaker, hang that dangly skeleton, or put on those vampy fangs—just don’t tell your mom they’re not for Halloween.
In the meantime, check out your story pick!
- The Last Day of the Faith, by T. R. Siebert
- Teaser: “On the morning of the last day of the faith, you bring me a bowl of fresh milk and a flower from your garden. Its petals are pristine, even though you had to carry it all the way up to the temple in the pocket of your apron.”
The Water-Bearer / Intellectual, Open-Minded, Outgoing / Unpredictable, Self-Conscious, Chaotic
Ignore those witchy calls and stay true to the course. I know pettiness can be tempting, but the high road will leave you feeling best. Of course, you could always dive into drama after the middle of the month (I won’t judge).
If all else fails, your October story pick is an absolute treat.
- Everybody’s Got a Hungry Heart, by Louis Evans
- Teaser: “Agent Heartbreak and the Misery Muse meet cute on a lonely-hearts cruise. Their gazes lock above the brunch buffet.”
The Fish / Charitable, Intuitive, Artistic / Timid, Impractical, Indolent
Guess what, Pisces? It’s time to indulge in your favorite candy and light a bunch of candles (bonus points if they’re creepy). This month will be 98% fun with just a dash of reflection. Enjoy the end of this triple-digit summer and embrace the season, you Halloween junkie.
Start the festivities with this timeless read.
- Red Dirt, by Scout Satterfield
- Teaser: “Red dirt. For miles. Nothing else surrounds the diner in The Middle of Nowhere, Arizona. A diner surrounded by dirt is the perfect place for peculiar things. Inside sit five booths of red vinyl riddled with cigarette burns and ketchup stains. The creases between the vinyl seats hide hardened fries, skin cells, ants, time.”